Tales of Nothingness
by xMegumix
Summary: I'm starting a nice little series of oneshots that will be about my story Remember Me. Mostly Humorous, but there will be other kinds of stories thrown into here too.


Hey everyone! Yes, I am bored enough to write a oneshot. Ah, lessee... its 10:36 and I feel like doing humor. For most of the people who read my story, you probably know that I love humor. Laughing is always fun for me, seeing as I don't get to find much to laugh at in my own home. Anywhose, Here's a nice little fic-let of a story.

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Axel sighed. It was about noon, and it was time to eat lunch. Of course, nobodies didn't really need to eat but ever since Yuki's arrival, he and Demyx took a habit into eating with the rather strange girl. Hey, what else is there to do in the castle of boredom? Axel let his chakrams fade away and made his way out of the large room he was in and found Demyx coming down the hallway. Just in time. Demyx grinned and put his hands on the back of his head.

"Fancy meeting you around here, stranger."

Axel rolled his eyes and took his usual place on the left of the younger nobody. "Yeah, good day to you too... Hey, why isn't Yuki with you?"

Demyx shrugged and took a left turn, Axel following suit. "I dunno. I didn't see her coming down the hallway... maybe she has a mission from Xemnas."

Axel nodded, crossing his arms as they reached the kitchen that was usually abandoned. Usually, you could tap the table a few times and the dust would literally move in one layer. When Yuki arrived, though, it all changed. It was now nice and clean, a much better environment in which one wasn't threatened by dust clouds with every step. Demyx opened up a white cabinet and blinked; he looked at the different ingredients he had been persuaded to buy with his munny not too long ago by Yuki. Grabbing a jar of who knows what, he opened the lid and smelled its contents.

"How do you think these things are supposed to be mixed? I mean, Yuki just grabs a bunch of stuff and puts them together and they usually taste pretty decent."

Axel shrugged, grabbing a cup of instant ramen and observing the container. "Who knows... Hey, wanna try to make lunch before Yuki gets here? We'll see if we can make better food than she can."

Demyx shrugged and pulled some more items out of the cabinet. "Sure. Um... so what do we do first?"

Both of the confused men stood there for a moment, observing what they had taken out of the cabinet. Axel picked up a random container and read the label.

"This stuff's called 'sugar'. Hmm... What is sugar?"

Demyx blinked and grabbed the container from Axel and poured quite a bit of sugar onto his palm. Pouring some into his mouth, he grinned happily at the little grains in his hand. "This stuff's really sweet. Try some!"

Axel poured some sugar into his palm and poured it into his mouth as well. Axel accidentally breathed some in and started to cough. Demyx laughed at the living fire hazard and took the jar of sugar away from him.

"Hah, you can't even take a little bit of sugar... Hey, what's this?"

Demyx had picked up a bottle of ketchup and was pouring some of the liquid substance onto his hand. Axel shrugged and opened the refrigerator, grabbing a packet of meat.

"Who knows... So, let's try to make something edible."

Demyx nodded and washed the ketchup off of his hand in the sink before returning to the table where they had set up their little workstation. Axel had placed the meat among the various items such as sugar, ketchup, salt, cans of soda, and celery. Demyx turned around and grabbed a knife off of a rack and started to chop up the celery into several lopsided and uneven pieces. We can only say he was having fun mutilating the green sticks.

Axel had taken the meat out of it's packaging and placed it onto the marble counter, remembering how Yuki would usually put the meat onto something that she could use fire to heat it. Grinning madly, Axel summoned his fire and shot it at the poor defenseless pieces of meat.

"Burn, baby!" Axel was grinning madly at the piece of meat. When he finished, there was no more liquid left, for it had all evaporated. What was left of it was charred beyond eating. Axel picked up the meat and grabbed a bowl, tossing the meat into it. Demyx threw the celery he had chopped up and placed it in the bowl as well. Demyx looked over at the sugar and grinned.

"Dude, how much sugar do you think we should put into there?"

Axel shrugged and picked up the container, dumping all of its contents into the large bowl. "All of it. Hey, if it tastes good, it shouldn't just sit there being unused, right?"

Demyx nodded, taking the ketchup and squirting a good amount over the mound of sugar. "Ketchup... it reminds me of blood. Does it taste good?"

Axel shrugged and opened a can of soda, remembering that they drank it separately. Shrugging, he poured some of the soda into the bowl. "There. We should be finished, right?"

Demyx nodded, grabbing a plate as they heard someone approaching. Axel blinked and ran out of the kitchen to hold off whoever was approaching. He blinked when he saw Yuki standing before him. He grinned and brought her over to a table that was outside of the kitchen.

"Hey! We made lunch this time!"

Yuki blinked as Axel forced her to sit down in a hair. "You guys know how to cook?"

Axel nodded with a smile. "Yup! Well, now we do... Now, close your eyes. This is going to be a surprise."

Yuki rolled her eyes but closed her eyes anyway. Demyx stuck his head out of the kitchen and looked at Axel. "Are we ready?"

Axel nodded. Demyx grinned and brought the monstrosity called lunch out, setting it on the table before Yuki. Demyx scooped a bunch of the half liquidized contents and smiled happily at Yuki, who had no idea of what she was about to eat.

"Open wide!"

Demyx then shoved the spoon into Yuki's mouth. For a moment, Yuki didn't respond, but the two nobodies saw her eye twitching. Yuki swallowed rather hard and opened her eyes immediately, running to the kitchen with a rather green face. Demyx and Axel blinked as they heard the sink running along with the sound of someone getting sick. Demyx frowned slightly and looked at Axel.

"Did she like it?"

Axel shrugged and looked at the bowl. He then popped his head into the kitchen to see Yuki leaning over the sink, her face rather pale. Yuki shut the water off and glanced over at Axel wearily.

"What the hell was that?!"

Demyx entered the kitchen with Axel, both of them looking rather disappointed. "What, isn't it good?"

Yuki sighed and started digging through her pockets to look for her small pouch of munny. "Let's go somewhere else to eat..."

--

Yay! Well, was it good? Was it awful? Hmm... Well, It's an attempt to make something a bit humorous. Well, I hope you enjoyed! Poor Yuki... X3


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